OT - So Nervous... ***UPDATE*** Thank you HB!

**jessicasturm** · August 1st, 2006, 03:24 PM

All I know is that I would be honored to have a sister like you! Good luck, and keep us updated!

**katherinecusick** · August 1st, 2006, 03:34 PM

I am keeping my fingers crossed for you! I hope that this call reunites you with not only a sister but a newfound friend. You are doing the right thing--especially if you feel that there is an emptiness with re: to your family. I truly believe everything happens for a reason, perhaps there is a wonderful one behind this phone call? Let us know what happens! My thoughts are with you :-) Katie

**muppetquilter** · August 1st, 2006, 03:50 PM

You've probably made the call by now, but my best advice is that after you know it is her you state who you are clearly and right up front, tell her you are really nervous but have wanted to know her for a long time, that you know this is coming completely out of the blue for her and could you give her your phone number, email and address because you'd like to talk when/if she is ready.

I have never done anything like this, but I have dealt with similar unknown family connections through adoption and have read a lot about it from an adoption stand point. While adoption isn't an issue here, the nervousness, desire to know family, and surprise aspect of it seem similar.

Good luck! Please don't be too hurt if she is not open to you. She may be thrown by your call and need some time to collect herself. Often an awkward or even awful, first contact gives way to a real, rewarding and warm relationship over time.

I think it is very brave of you to reach out this way! [img]smile.gif[/img]

**judiaci** · August 1st, 2006, 06:08 PM

Dee - how did things go?

**DaisyDee** · August 1st, 2006, 06:31 PM

I finally got my nerve up enough to call around 9pm. I dailed the numbre, it rang once, and I heard "beep boop beep, We're sorry but you have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service..." [img]graemlins/cry.gif[/img] I was so close. I thought I had found her. I called directory assistance, but there was no listing for either her or her husband in Oregon or Washington. My BFF suggested that maybe they switched to using a cell phone, which I think is a very logical explanation. My other thought is that even if they moved, I still have an address, and most people do forward their mail. So, I guess I am going to have to write a letter. This is probably a good thing anyway; I will be able to carefully and thoughtfully choose my words, instead of stuttering and stammering over the phone. I'm still pretty disappointed though. [img]frown.gif[/img]

thepidget · August 1st, 2006, 06:47 PM

Dee, I'm so sorry you couldn't get through to her! That's definitely disappointing. [img]graemlins/wilted.gif[/img] However, I do hope that your letter idea will work--and putting your thoughts into written words can be a lot less nerve-wracking than making a phone call.

Wishing you tons of good luck! [img]biggrin.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rose.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rose.gif[/img]

**muppetquilter** · August 1st, 2006, 07:20 PM

I'm very sorry! What a let down after all the effort it took to work up your courage.

Write the letter! That sounds like a great way to make a first contact. And if the letter comes back to you, you could always hire a PI to find her. They are not that expensive and it's easy to make sure you get someone reputible.

**katherinecusick** · August 1st, 2006, 08:00 PM

Dear Dee,
What a disappointment for you! I agree that you should definitely write a letter and send it to the address you have. At least you will know that you tried your best to contact your sister no matter what happens. Please know my thoughts are with you! Katie

**Katie148** · August 1st, 2006, 09:19 PM

I'm so sorry you couldn't get through to your sister. How disappointing! [img]graemlins/wilted.gif[/img] I think a letter is a great idea - it might minimize some of the shock she may feel at hearing from you and will let her collect herself and her feelings before she contacts you back. I hope your letter will find its way to her. Best of luck. [img]graemlins/rose.gif[/img]

**DaisyDee** · August 1st, 2006, 10:21 PM

***UPDATE***

Well, since I can't find much on my sister, I decided to search her husband's name on the web, and I think I might've found his MySpace page! It shows him as being single and living in Seattle, and the first place I found my sister's married name it had her listed as living in Portland. I guess that pretty much means they are divorced. But, I sent him a message with my family info and telling him about my search through MySpace, and we'll se what happens! I'm crossing my fingers!!!!! I've got some hope again!

~Dee